Oh, so women can’t dress how they want because men can’t control their sexual urges? When dogs can’t control their sexual urges, we cut off their balls.
I think I’m onto something here.
getting an 80% on a test in 8th grade:
(loud wailing that lasts at least an hour followed by a sinking feeling of despair and uselessness)
getting an 80% on a test now:
(power slides down the hall while singing the national anthem)
I’ve recently decided to freeze myself to -273℃. My friends think I’ll die, but I’ll be 0K.
reading in head:
i'm practically a master of linguistics my pronunciations are perfect beyond compare
*chokes on spit*
March 4th. March forth!
Marching band puns
for a whole month
BEING CALLED CUTE MAKES ME FEEL SO GOOD WOW ANYONE WHOSE EVER CALLED ME CUTE THANK U SUNSHINE KISSES TO U I LOVE U
i wish i was skinny enough to wear leather jackets and short jean shorts and short skirts with ripped leggings and boots and look sexy as hell and then come home and drink hot chocolate while wearing an oversized sweater and cute fuzzy socks without feeling like fucking shrek okay
i really wanna kiss you and be cute with you and fall asleep in your arms and go on stupid dates but i also sort of want to light you on fire and throw myself into traffic so idk
"why dont you just give him a chance"
idk because im not physically or mentally attracted to him and ‘but he likes you’ or ‘but hes really nice’ isnt going to change the fact that im not interested